Blood of the innocent

20 Mar

No, this post is not entirely about Quentin Tarantino movies, so there will be no fountains of blood but I will have to mention the B-word a couple of times. If you are weak of heart or an abstaining vampire, please stop reading.

I watched ‘Django Unchained’ recently. Let us get it out of the way- I love Quentin Tarantino’s movies and I am also very partial to Christoph Waltz. Mr.Waltz was magnificent in the movie, as was his moustache. This movie, though, was not just about people, its about QT’s signature, his main character and prop – Blood, copious amount of blood, blood that sprays, pumps and dances to Tarantino’s direction.

But as I said, this post is not about the movie but is related. I know a man that claims that the blood of pigeons and bats will cure many maladies, ranging from asthma and weakness to deafness.

This man is from northern parts of India and has had some schooling. He speaks Hindi and Konkani fluently and understands more than he speaks in English. He is an honest and kind man. We like him a lot. Here comes the but – but he can completely flummox me by such claims. He sometimes assumes that me having an education means I cannot know anything practical and even though I am an Indian and brought up in India, he thinks I am unwise to Indian ways. I do not know where he got this impression but I cannot disabuse him of this idea. So his explanation about how pigeon’s blood would magically cure coughing fits.

His claim is – of course all a true story- he has seen his 80-yr old neighbour who had breathing trouble, get better in a day after drinking pigeon’s blood. Why is this story true? Because the old man did not know that he was drinking a dove’s blood, he thought it was juice because they mixed it with something else – a “dovetail”, it was. So it could not have been placebo effect or just his immune-system finally kicking the germ out. It was the miraculous pigeon blood.

I was contemplating this extra-ordinary story when he launched into the next one about the bats. Supposedly, bats blood can cure deafness. This time you do not drink it but drip it into your ear. Of course, again a true story. It could not have been that the association came about because bats can ‘see’ through echo-location and have large ears – it must be that the blood of the bat has magical properties. And it should be able to cure deafness. No wonder Ozzy Osbourne bites bats, must be to keep deafness at bay, what with his music and all.

How can I tell his person, without hurting his feelings and ego, that what he has known as the truth all his life is,in fact, baseless? The other side is, what if this is true and the pharma companies are not aware of this fact? Now, I like bats but do not like pigeons that much. I have a whole flock of pigeons roosting in our balcony which I will be happy to donate for the advancement of science!

Please note that without Tarantino, the fake-blood industry that supplies hollywood would go bankrupt and there will be blood of the innocents’ on your hands, so please do watch Tarantino movies.

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3 Responses to “Blood of the innocent”

  1. Preetha Mahadevan March 20, 2013 at 4:34 am #

    cud both be right? could both co-exist in their realms of truth? here goes an episode – blood vs pharma for gopinath – makkal yaar pakkam?

  2. karma2000 March 20, 2013 at 6:54 am #

    I was thinking Big Pharma vs Bird conservationists?

  3. Kasam March 20, 2013 at 12:51 pm #

    seriously… if Pharma can extract recombinant dna from horse’s piss to treat diabetes and infertility, then why not bat’s blood.. it all goes back to famous story of morarji’s 🙂

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